What I Think About When I Run

When you're training or a marathon, you have a lot of free time on your hands to do nothing but think about stuff.  So today during my 7 mile marathon pace run, (8:04 splits...pretty happy with it) I tried to make a mental note of everything I thought about.  Kinda like a mental inventory.  Let's see how it worked out.

• Damn, 7 miles at marathon pace is gonna kick my ass
• Why do I live at the lowest elevation on my runs?
• What the f*** is that guy doing?  A**h*** almost ran me over!
• Damn, am I at a mile yet?  Gotta remember to record my splits
• God, I love when I finally hit Wedgewood.  Good downhill bit coming up!
• I wonder if my bosses are going to see me running while they are heading to lunch.  Better not run into them.
• Where are all the Vandy kiddies on this beautiful day?  Probably drinking already.
• 2 miles down.  When am I 33% done?  Oh yeah, at 2.33333333.... miles.  I'm a nerd.
• I HATE red lights.  I wish I had that radar thing an ambulance has so I could change red lights to green whenever I want.
• I HATE traffic.  21st during lunch hour sucks...AND I have to cross w/o a light.  
• Almost halfway done!  DAMN, that is one ugly dog.  Is that a dog?  Wow, weird.
• How're the splits going?  Hmmm...seem like they are going alright. 
• Why are girls bat shiat crazy sometimes?  I mean they are all a little crazy, but some are WAY out there.  (sidenote, there isn't a run long enough for me to answer this question, sorry ladies.  I know we men have our problems too)
• Alright, 4 miles down, almost to Belmont.  I'll be heading back soon!
• Great day, 55 degrees, awesome!  Crap, I just stepped in dog crap.  WTF???  Please PICK UP AFTER YOUR DOG!
• I don't fit into the Belmont U. crowd.  
• Why does every person think that someone running is the best person to stop and ask directions.  If I hate stopping at red lights, I sure as hell don't like stopping for you...unless you're cute, then I'll probably stop.
• 1.4 miles to go!  Mostly downhill from here.
• The girl that just passed me smelled like candy.  I think sweet tarts.  That's not even fair smelling like sweet tarts, especially when I'm training for a marathon.
• Damn, a lot of homeless people at the shelter today.  At least it's nice out for them.
• What am I going to do with my friends all weekend?  How am I going to keep up my healthy, non-drinking regiment while they're in town.  I must be strong.
• DONE!  Whohoo.  7 miles done, 56 minutes to complete.
• I need a beer.

There it is.  The depths of my mind.  I don't really know what to make of it.  Do you?